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What to Say to a Friend Who May Be Suicidal: A Compassionate Guide for Women

By Audrey Levens  ·  September 15, 2025

September is National Suicide Prevention Month, a time to shed light on one of the hardest conversations we can have: how to help a friend who might be thinking about suicide.

Maybe you’ve noticed changes in a friend’s mood, or she’s confided that she’s feeling depressed. Now you’re wondering what to say and how to respond. In this guide, we’ll walk through how to recognize warning signs, have a conversation, and share resources that can help save a life.

Recognizing the Warning Signs

While depression and suicidal thoughts can often be silent struggles, there are clear warning signs that someone you know or love may be hurting. If you notice any of these, it could be time to check in and start a conversation:

  • Persistent sadness, hopelessness
  • Isolation or withdrawal from social situations
  • Talking or writing about death or dying
  • Increased alcohol or drug use
  • Acting recklessly or impulsively
  • Sudden calmness or apathy after a long period of distress
  • Angry outbursts or unexpected rage
  • Giving away personal belongings
  • Visiting or calling people to say goodbye

Supporting someone through mental health struggles is never a solo job. It takes friends, family, and professionals working together. And while it’s important to respect privacy, keeping suicidal thoughts a secret can be dangerous.

How to Talk to a Friend About Suicide

Approaching a friend about something as serious as suicidal thoughts can feel intimidating, but your support matters. Here are some tips:

  • Be present and listen to them. Give your friend space to share without interrupting or judging.
  • Let them know you care. Simple phrases like “I’m here for you” or “You’re not alone” can be powerful. Don’t assume that they know; be intentional about telling them how you feel.
  • Take them seriously. Some friends may make jokes or play it off as if it’s not a big deal. Treat everything they say seriously.
  • Remember, you don’t have to do it alone. Reach out for help. Bring another friend or trusted adult with you to start the conversation. If you think your friend is in immediate danger, call 911.

What to Say to a Suicidal Friend

Sometimes finding the right words is the hardest part. Here are a few simple ways to open up a tough conversation:

  • “I’ve noticed you’ve seemed really sad lately. How are you feeling?”
  • “I’m worried about you and want to make sure you’re safe.”
  • “You’re important to me. Can we talk about what’s been going on?”

If they are hesitant, don’t push, but don’t assume the situation will solve itself. End the conversation by discussing the next steps, such as contacting a counselor together or calling a helpline. Remember, you’re not expected to “fix” anyone, but you can help them feel less alone and connect them to professional care.

Suicide Prevention Resources to Share with a Friend

Having resources ready can make it easier for your friend to get help. Here are just a few resources:

  • 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 to reach trained crisis counselors 24/7.
  • Crisis Text Line: Text “HOME,” “START,” or “HELLO” to 741741 to connect with a trained listener.
  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 800-273-8255.
  • If you believe your friend is in immediate danger, call 911 right away.

Why Suicide Prevention Matters

Talking about suicide is uncomfortable, but it can save lives. By noticing the warning signs, opening the door to an honest conversation, and connecting your friend to help, you can play a vital role in their healing journey.

If you or someone you know is struggling, reach out. Support is available, and you’re not alone.

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